Grammar Police

One fateful day, I was reading my school's student-produced newspaper, and I stumbled upon the most heinously written article.  I find it astonishing that the Editor-In-Chief allowed something of such poor quality to be published in his paper.  I took it upon myself to do some editing.  Red pen in hand, I made all of the necessary corrections to make the article meet at least grammatical standards.  Its content was nothing short of a rant written by a frustrated boy, I'm sure.  I would just like to show you how much correction was required.

Dear Editor,
Please do your job.  I don't want to experience pain when I read the articles in your publication.
Sincerely,
The Grammar Police